PROMISES, PROMISES

Part of the first seminary lesson was to write down spiritual goals. Since I have issues with the word "goals", I have decided to call them "intentions". I was instructed to write them, then put them in a drawer and come back to them in 8 months. Although the instructions specified that I was to "forget" about the intentions once I put them away, I wanted to write them here. The intentions with which I started this journey still stand. To be able to tap into the great love within myself, so I can give it to others. To overcome obstacles to loving and caring. To become more mindful. I have added being able to meditate regularly for 10 minutes at a time, completing the Quest, and finishing the course I'm taking, plus four more.
The discourse for this week directed me to pay attention to whether I am acting or thinking from a place of love or not. That will be something. I think I'm more often NOT coming from a place of love. I do want to change that, however.
I have stopped feeling ashamed about the whole "keeping my word" thing and started to feel rather angry. While I think it's important to be reliable, I don't agree that I have a duty to keep my word no matter what. That was part of the basic message for this week. I have a problem with it. If I say I will go somewhere or do something with someone at a particular time, I intend to follow through. But if I'm ill or an emergency arises, I will NOT expect myself to keep that date. Likewise, if I take marriage vows and my partner beats me up or abuses my kids, I will not stay in that relationship. And if I promise to keep secret what someone tells me in confidence, I will not remain silent about their plans to kill their spouse, harm their child, or take their own life. Keeping your word is a good thing, but I am opposed to the idea that I must ALWAYS keep my word at all costs! Wow! I could really get on a soapbox about THAT!